It will never be the same...

Jumping on the bandwagon again, thanks to Natalie aka Mommy of a Monster I mean toddler and infant twins.

The classic phrases first time mother's get all the time. "You're a mama now!"  or "Oh you'll get the hang of it". And then you want to either cry or punch the person politely thank them for their thoughtfulness and assistance. We sometimes, I mean all the time, think of the things we've forgotten, lost, banished or completely went into a black hole. 

1. You’ve completely lost your purse to tissues, hot-wheel cars, loads of candy for bribing, various McDonald’s toys, etc. Never again will you just have a cute clutch that will hold just a few things.
2. Going to the store by yourself is like taking a trip cross country. Taking every single long side road to get there and back, taking your sweet time getting through the store. Not taking the self check out and getting behind the little old lady with 50 different types of cat food. And she has coupons!
3. A granola bar and a huge cup of coffee is breakfast of champions.
4. You know every Disney, Nick and Cartoon Network theme song by heart and can sing them at ANY time. Sometimes in the most inappropriate situations.
5. You ask where the potty is.
6. Being bored is not an luxury anymore. There’s always something to procrastinate with.
7. You cut up your husband’s meat as well as your kids before each meal. Just in case.
8. Doing your nails in the shower is normal weekly thing.
9. Your feet stick to the kitchen floor… and you don’t care.
10. Going clothes shopping eventually ends up in buying more clothes for the kids, and one piece for you.
11. Cussing turns into a game where instead of &@$% it is now fudge. And then they ask for a fudgesicle.
12. At work, you find yourself writing on post-it notes with crayon.
13. You’re willing to kiss your kid’s boo-boo, no matter where it is.
14. Cleaning the kitchen at 1am is not crazy, it’s a daily routine.
15. At night when the house is clean, the kids are in bed and you are exhausted, you still spend 10 minutes watching the kids sleep, and thanking God for all of it.

I just don't stumble, I plant my face into the sidewalk.

Ok... here's the thing. I'm sitting here, in front of the computer, playing with this thing. It's big, huge even. Lots of people probably use it but don't have the guts to say so. Mine in blue and green, but it could possibly be just my preference. It's kinda lazy way of doing things, but I like it that way. No real human interaction, no clean up necessary.

What did you think it was???

To take a break from the clicking and the eye gouging, here's Tues Tag Along. 

Don't forget to add the blogs to the stumble!

We interupt this Earthquake to bring you a Tornado Warning

Has anyone seen the movie 2012? I was thinking about it about 2pm dis afternoon. Here in Buffalo, New York. We usually see snow.

Like this type of snow.

Today. We felt a earthquake. Completely out of our comfort zone, I called my mother in law in Eden, NY. She felt it. Aaron called his dad in Derby, NY. He felt it.

Later we learn the earthquake is from Canada! 500 miles away. (The quake, not Canada.) C'mon! Nothing screams zombies and apocalyptic tragedies as something like this. This is horribly confusing. Here's a diagram.

Ok, I'm over-reacting here. I'm sorry.

But it was cool. No damage, no one died and certainly no zombies.

Yet.

We went out for dinner, everything as usual. Everyone is talking about it. I think one person had his windshield broken and someone's cheap Wal-mart pool fell apart.

Then we get a Tornado warning. Again, to refresh.. it's Buffalo, NY.

This isn't So. Cal or Arkansas. The worst we see is about 12 feet of snow and we dig ourselves out. No big deal.

And, it all brings me to this song.

Tues Tag Along on a Hot Car

Welcome to Tuesday Tag Along, where I shamelessly put my name on a list with a group of bloggers hoping for someone to read this so I don't look like a crazy lady. Join, please, so others like me don't have to go into the loony bin.

So my last few posts have been well... not as unique as they should be, way to emo as they ought to be and to far apart. I want to say I'm sorry for any lack of creativity that I've stripped from this place. I can promise that I will try and try again to drink more alcohol and get out of the *ddddduuuuhhhhhh* *gurgle* *gurgle* staring at my computer screen like it's a porn movie syndrome that I've been in.

Good thing, I just haven't been staring at this screen that long. If you look or remember the post where I said I'm to scared to ride muscle cars and muscle men. Weelll... let's take off one.

Friends and I went to a car show.  A really perty car show and now Aaron and I are thinking of the future. Ya know, wedding bells and screaming babies and all that shit nice things. We got to talking about buying one of these beauties some day. In the long distant future, probably when dogs grow wings and my ass gets smaller.

Please ignore the bug... well don't. That's my beauty. Whenever we see one on the road, we kinda get giddy and try to figure out with double agent is in one. There's only 4 in the tri-state area!!!

Darrell got excited over the Charger, obviously. His father is a Dukes of Hazzard addict. Full plaid shirts, running from the law, hound dog, daisy duke = don't sleep with your cousin thing. He was upset that it was blue instead of orange. But what can ya do? Not everyone wants to drag around a confederate flag on the top of their car.

It was nice, very nice actually, seeing old friends who know me best and who can understand my humor. Nos Bottle - 5. Katie - 2. Really, I can't put the freakin' cap on for the life of me. My friend Dan threatened to go get a sippy cup, I told him to leave that for the jack & coke. Seriously, don't waste a good thing man.

So sippy cup, sleeping cousins and hot cars aside. I'm back, sorta. I've always been here but I'm going to try harder at being myself instead of a drone. 

Promise on my future cars life. Minus the small ass.

Dear Dad

Hey Dad.

How you’ve been? I’m sure you’re having the time of your life having a beer with Sr. and playing cards with Papa.

How’s Mom? Make sure that she’s happy, You always made her laugh.

Darrell is getting big. Huge even. He reminds me of you sometimes. Stubborn and hard headed. Never in my life did I think that my son would be as bad as I was. I really want to say I’m sorry for that. For being a little brat.

You’re going to be disappointed in me. I haven’t seen a race in over a year. Haven’t been to one either since Tony took me to Holland for the figure 8 races. The seats are uncomfortable and the beer is flat, what can I say?

Funny thing, I go by Nicholason and Hall each day to work. They had a huge sign on the front that said Boilermakers of America, I think you’d like it. Never went inside, I’m sure a lot of the guys will remember you but I’ve changed from the little 5 year old blond girl. They’d probably look at me like I’m crazy.

Grandma is doing okay. She’s really upset about how Doug is treating the house, I want to punch him sometimes. But it was her decision, and with this economy, I could of never kept up with it. Better to go with blood than anything else, right?

Aunt Marty and Uncle Bob are doing great too. She’s finally retired after all these years. But keeps on going, ya know? Never stopping. Oh… and make sure that Rusty gets a good walking.

Dexter’s fence is still up, and the hole in the wall from when I was so mad at you I threw a shoe. Oh wait.. You never knew about that. Sorry? I hid it with a N’Sync picture for years. Even though I think Justin Timberlake is annoying as hell. Oh yea, was that you that turned the light on a few years ago in your room? If it was, it scared the shit out of me. And my cat. I don’t think I moved that fast in years.

You were right about a lot of things. I see that now. Working to support your family is an honor, not a chore. I take pride in my work, even though I don’t get up off of my ass for 8 hours. You always told me that you didn’t want me to work with my hands, it’s not a woman’s job, but I do, in a different way.

You’d like Aaron. Even though he’s a democrat. He cares about me, a lot. The ethics, and the personal endeavors is amazing. He never stops learning and never stops teaching me the beauty of patience. I really think you and him would get along good, over a beer, of course. He’s really good for Darrell, and me too. Keeps us on our toes.

Surprisingly, you were wrong. I hate to say it but you were about one thing. I’m not to much of a cry baby to get a tattoo. And it didn’t hurt as much as you said it was, I think you were trying to scare me. Your last one, with the wolf howling at the moon, it’s really weird in some ways. My friends call us a pack, a family. Blood is strong but family is stronger. Even though we never shared the same blood, Dad, you’re always my father. I could never think of it any other way.

The days where I need the strength and the courage to get through a obstacle, I think of you.  Never giving up, never giving in. Always strong and always with pride. You’ve been my rock, sort of speak, for the past 4 years. It’s been a long road, but I’m starting to finally get my life back together. I hope your proud.

I love you Daddy, I miss you... and Happy Father's Day. 

R.I.P. Alan Binko

8/28/50-2/12/05

Sweaty boobs & Pinned back hair.

It was my day off. Was is the key word here.

The day is coming to a close and I've accomplished so freakin' much I think I'm gonna pass out.

We can see the floor of our bedroom, first in months.

I can see the floor in my son's room, first in ever.

The main thing here is that I need to take a shower. Grimy, sweaty, smelly woman I am, cleaning takes a lot outta ya when it's 80 degrees. 

And I'm making taco dip so when Aaron gets home, he'll be greeted by a horny happy me and a dish of fresh taco dip.

I am an awesome girlfriend but sorry dear, I definately won't look like this. 

Wordless Wednesday - This is what I want to do sometimes

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In my own defense....

Where have I been? 

Honestly I don't know.

Oh wait... at work. Sitting in front of a computer screen, looking at Christmas lights in the Que.

It seems like a bit and a half since I've blogged, or really tried. I want to apologize, in my own defense. 

So instead of writing something miraculous because I just don't have the bull-shit power energy. I'm gonna steal this from Papoe who stole it from a crap load of people.

99 Things 

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo

11. Bungee jumped
12. Visted Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset

31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person 

(I live 45 minutes away from N.F., I've been there SEVEN TIMES!)
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community

(If anyone is near Central New York, check out a little town called Penn Yan, NY.

It's surround by Amish Country)
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone Rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo's David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance

(Rode in one just for shits and giggles)
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Effel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain

53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone Whale Watching

63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Save a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been a passenger on a motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person

80. Publish a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper

(When I was a youngin', I had my picture in the paper a few times. 

That's what you get for living in a town of 200.)
85. Kissed a stranger at midnight on NYE
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone's life

(Not literally, but I've been told that by two people)
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Gotten a tattoo 

(I have two!)

94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swan in the Great Salt Lake

(I'm assuming the great lakes. Lake Erie!)
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee    

So I haven't really seen much in my life. Never have been outside this time zone except once in a flight delay in Atlanta. But I've done a lot of things.

What have you done?

Crazy People

There are a lot of crazy good people out there.

Lewis Black, Tim Burton, Barack Obama (c'mon, you know he's gotta be crazy to deal with all of this!)

But there are every day crazy good people 

Courtesy of Finally Mom

Courtesy of Twenty Little Toes

THANK YOU!!!!!!

 For the Trendy Blog Award •To receive this award, promise to share this with 10 other blog that you think are Trendy too.•Post about your award in your blog.•Share with the bloggers .• Ask them they need to give this award out to 10 as well.

For the Honest Scrap So the rules are telling 10 lies interesting things about myself, and then pass the award along to other great bloggers.

1. I love everything oriental. We've got my grandmother's Chinese tea napkins hung on the wall, a few Katanas and a ken-do stick (only for a deterrent, not actually used outside the bedroom) 
2. As much as I'm a computer hog, I will sit in the sun for a few hours a day just for the melatonin. 
3. Once we've started, my boyfriend and I can have a pretty good political debate. Often other people will get involved and then us yell at them. :-)
4. I was once a hippy. Tie die shirts, hemp purse and hand made sandals. I was only 13.
5. The new mocha frappes at McDonalds are the bomb, but honestly if I drink to many, I'll become the fattest woman.
6. Getting me up successfully in the morning is like convincing a tiger that a nice bath is good for them.
7. Online, I'm like Martha Stewart with organizing files, pictures, etc. Offline, I'm lucky enough to find my toothbrush.
8. As a kid, my favorite cartoon show was Dragonball Z. Little did I know how awesome anime actually is. 
9. I use to scrap. Like real big. But it got to costly and a lot of work. Maybe one day I'll get back into it.
10. I'm a sop for muscle cars and muscle men. But I'm to afraid to ride either one. Hehe. 

Now after you've cried with boredom... here are the people receiving the award for awesomeness.

**Gotta share the love**

Finally Mom

Twenty Little Toes 

Accidental Baby Maker

Velvet Over Steel

Lemons to Lemonade

Punk Rock Momma

Saving Mom's sanity

The Way I see things

The Allison Wonderland

Adventures in Mommywood

Looking at the face of death... or rather a door.

I'm back after work three 12 hour shifts in a row. Last night around 11pm, I was nearly crying to get out of there. It's my choice, but why does time have to go by so slow???

Literally crawling out of there last night, Aaron and I came home without the baby. My ex was nice enough to take him again for the night so that we could get some sleep and relax for a bit. And Darrell was asleep by the time we got out of work.

Two glasses of wine and the blue comedy tour is food for the soul.

Better news... I almost died.

Not really, but it felt that way and I will never take the middle elevator again.

I got in, the doors closed and they didn't open.

I didn't panic... until later. For some reason I just kept my calm, kinda huddled in a corner and waited for the security guard to come around. It's said that the elevators at my work are the oldest in the city.

What sucks is that I couldn't get a signal with my cell phone. There was a old rotary phone in the elevator, so I used that. But if it was plummeting or doing something funky, I couldn't call anyone to tell them my last wishes.

I got out fine, obviously. Late from my break, sent a message to my supervisor and then banged my head promptly on my desk.

Which this reminds me to adjust my will. Oh yes, I have a will. I believe everyone over the age of 18 should have one because we're not God and never know when we're going to kick the bucket. At least something saying "Mom I love you" or "Don't forget to feed the cat".

And.... to finish my bucket list.

Balls of steel

I'd like to think I am. Solid steel, never waver, no tears, no pain. 

If some people haven't read the "About me", I'm 22 years old. And this has thus far happened.

I was born ('cause that's traumatic enough), my parents got a divorce, my mother was diagnosed with cancer, my mother died of cancer, I move in with my dad, my mother's boyfriend commits suicide over IRS and gambling debt (HA! Irony sucks!), my grandfather passes away, I find out my father adopted me, my dad gets diagnosed with cancer, he passes away, I graduate from high school.... keeping up yet? I essentially had a nervous breakdown and ran away from home, got pregnant, married, survived marriage from hell (it really wasn't), had my son after almost dying on the table. My husband and I got into a bad-ass argument, left my husband, met my boyfriend, left my boyfriend and went back to my husband, lost my job, car, apartment, sanity. I start seeing my boyfriend again, husband leaves. (Don't blame him) Became homeless since the first time since 2005...

The good parts; got a job, moved in with boyfriend's family, had visitation with son, got a better job, shit hits the fan, I get my son and then got an apartment.

So here I am... alive. Sorta. My husband and I are on speaking terms, not killing each other and keeping it real for the kid. We're trying to figure things out without really talking to each other, it sucks. The court system believes that we can work things out with a restraining order that I told them not to put on. We can only talk about the kid.

I really sound ghetto right now and I want to apologize but life sucks.

Things aren't all cute as kittens and giggles and kisses around here. I work hard, like 50 hours a week hard. I love my job, I'm a moron for that too but it's a good job with good people working for a good company. What else can a gal ask for?

Why the hell am I writing all this and making everyone believe that I'm a ghetto redneck bitch from hell?

Because I've just been that way lately. Not towards people, but towards life. I haven't been able to write good things lately, just shit is starting to creep towards the fan and I don't want everyone alarmed.

When it hits, I'm going to be right here. Writing is my tool to sanity. I've got almost 3 dozen half written journals in the bedroom that I have yet to finish, a half written memoir of stuff that doesn't make any sense if you read it from front to back and a head full of words. 

So... to clarify, I'm not steel. I feel like I am but I'm not. I hope ya'll can understand... yo.

Tweet, Twit, Twirp, Teet, Tit, BOOB!

So I've joined.

No, I lie. I've been for a while. I just never really kept up with it. In the months that I had joined, I guess I had gotten a half a dozen followers whom I have absolutely no clue who they are.

Stalkers? Probley.. Not so sexy because it could possibly be a fake name/picture/person. Imagine a computer somewhere in bum-fuck egypt and some really ugly creepy dude following me.

So... as I sit here staring at this line where only a 140 characters can bare my heart and soul. Aaron goes up to me and says "oh... Katie... why?????" 

Please tell me what I'm suppost to do with this thing. I "tweeked" it to look not so blah, but what am I suppost to say?

My ass itches?

Darrell is picking his nose?

Going to sleep?

Oh wait, I do that on Facebook. 

Follow me if you want, just ignore the creepy homicidal dudes. 

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star... oh wait, this shit doesn't work.

Why is it when you're a kid, you never want to sleep. Bed-time is the forbidden zone where you fight, scream, negotiate and wrangle your way out of it. But when you're an adult, sleep is a luxury. Especially after you had those said kids who will give their souls for an extra hour out of bed. 

Of course, as an adult. We have additives in our lives that keep us awake. ie. Coffee, energy drinks, tea, cold showers, work, sex. So, ultimately, it's our own fault for not getting the correct amount of sleep that we need. 

This philosophical point comes from...

My kid not wanting to go to bed.

A thousand and two kisses and hugs, asking if he can have 2 gallons of milk, juice, water, beer. Getting up, sitting down. Going to give the cat a kiss goodnight... oh wait, he forgot to give it a hug. Then back down. Then he forgot to give the fishie a hug and kiss... and oh wait, don't forget about Aaron. And then the juice, and then the questions. 

Why is the walls white? Because they are Darrell, go to sleep. Why do we sleep? Because we need sleep to live Darrell. Why do we live? Because God gave us life Darrell, now go to sleep. Then the God questions. 

Sometimes I wish I could duct tape him to a wall.

And then I remember that's illegal and unsafe.

Then I wonder why some people are allowed to breed.

See where my kid's questions come from?

Wordless Wednesday - Good parts in life

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You often have to look for them to find them. But there are good parts in life.