Saturday, March 27, 2010

On my mind...

What’s been on my mind a lot lately? My ability of being a parent.

I know I’ve written about this before, repetitive paranoia. Well it’s not really the ability of me being a parent. It’s me wanting to have a job that gives me the ability to be a better parent.

Right now, picking my son up so late is getting on my nerves. I want to put him to bed at a regular hour, I want to be able to spend some time with him, maybe even have a late dinner and then play some. It’s not a horrible request, it’s something very normal.

But my life is far from normal.

So to bring normalcy to life, I asked work for a change in scheduling. I’ve already been told by two people that it’s nearly impossible due to what team Aaron is working on. If I don’t get this change… I don’t know what I’m going to do.

I don’t like changes, I don’t like life being unknown. Yes, yes I can’t predict the future. But if I have a good understand of what’s to come, then I can sleep a little better at night.

Like, for about 2 weeks now I thought that I didn’t have Easter off and that I had to work. Checking my schedule for next week, I find out that I do have it off, Aaron doesn’t…

Darrell is going down to his father’s grandparent’s house for the weekend. I’ll probley either ask to come in or go up to my best friend’s house. The idea of spending a holiday alone irks me. I’ve never done it before.

So in essence, I just hope that everything works out okay. That life can be planned and thought out instead of wondering things. And maybe I can get some more sleep.

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