Friday, April 23, 2010

Second one

A few weeks ago coming back from my best friend’s house upstate, I ended up having a weird conversation with my son.

Honestly, I kinda wish it was the birds & the bees convo, but it didn’t quite go that way.

Mommy… I want a baby sister.”

Insert- My heart Drop.
Insert- The boyfriend’s face go entirely white.
Insert- Ultimate silence.

Maybe in a few years dear” I look over to the boyfriend carefully, hoping not to see him dead or wanting to duct tape my son’s mouth shut.

But I want a baby ssssiiisssttterrr….. Ppppleeeeaaassseee???!!!” 

In a few years dear, not right now” I felt like I was talking about going to school or a new toy.

But I want one NOW!

It takes a while, I just can’t pull over on the side of the road and pop one out.

But why not?


This comes to the idea of having another baby and many many talks with Aaron. The idea to him is off and on. Sometimes he’s cool with it, other time’s he’s not. Especially after a tantrum from Darrell. Sometimes I’m cool with the idea, 100% there. And then other times, I’m not. Like after a hard day at work, or after a bad day with my son.

Honestly, I do. The whole baby craze has driven me a little crazy. I’m seeing a lot of my friends from high school, a lot of my co-workers and just people in general have kids. (Angelina on her 7th?! ) But seeing other people getting pregnant really a good reason for me to have another one?
Probably not.  But there is still a twinge.

The age thing is there, especially with Aaron. I’m only 22, but he’s getting up there. I know I don’t want him to lose his wild years but at the same time, I want him to be able to enjoy being a parent. Not having a half heart attack.

The age thing isn’t just for Aaron and I either. It’s also with Darrell. To far apart, to close together? What’s the freakin’ difference… well my brother and I are 10 years apart. It’s not a pretty thing.

Lastly, finances… the money… the big pot. I don’t want to work when I have my next, and if I do, it’s going to be at home. I’d rather work from home and make my own hours then have to put our child into daycare. Nap time ten times a day, boobie time in front of the computer, babies have a tendency to be quiet if you let them… maybe.

But looking at this.

Definitely makes my heart melt.

So… if you have the option. Would you have another child? Bring another piece into your family?

P.S. There’s a TEST that you can take to decide whether or not your ready for Number 2. I’m upset that it didn’t include the question- “Are you ready to be fat again?”

P.P.S. This was the best straight forward list I could find that didn’t make you think children were gifts from the devil.


  1. It's a tough decision! I often tell my husband that if we'd had my son first, I don't know if I would have had a second child together. I love him, but what a handful! :D I think that honestly, you're 22. You've got PLENTY of time to decide.

  2. Ugh, that is such a hard conversation to have with your spouse if you're both not on the same page. In my marriage (we're divorced now), my husband basically said he was getting a vasectomy with or without my approval... We had one child together, when I was 20 and he was 30... and I think the age thing was really a factor in him not wanting any more. Me, personally? I desperately want more children, haha. I just have to find love, get married... do it the right way for once:)

    Thanks for including my booties, by the way!

  3. This is always a tough choice, and a personal one. There is no right or wrong answer. I was adamant I was done at 2 children, and then my third was a surprise. I was not happy when I found out, and guilty for feeling that way too. But now, I wouldnt change it for the world. Even with finances stretched tighter than I want, I'll gladly eat Ramen Noodle dinners if need be. But thats my choice, and its right for me, you know?
    Whatever choice you make, make sure that you both are on the same page. And you have got plenty of time to make that choice, even if it feels like the clock is ticking.

    Found you on MBC. Love your blog. Will follow!

  4. Following from MBC! I was just talking about this same thing with a friend who's thinking of having a baby. There are so many things to think about but I really believe that if you decide to have another, everything will work itself out. The age difference between kids is important to think about though. I'm 10 years older than my youngest sister and we are from 2 different worlds! We're really close, but I definitely am more of a motherly type figure sometimes which is tough.

    Stop by and visit me at

  5. Thanks everyone for the advice and support. I kinda know that I am young but I don't feel it. Maybe it's just that get it done and outta of the way type of feeling.

    Sorta like dishes.

  6. I personally feel that you should be married first and that you shouldn't marry any one who doesn't feel the same on the topic as you do.


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