Thursday, May 6, 2010

Thirteen Thursday

The epilogue of my paint extravaganza had leaded me to a few pointers for anyone who wishes to paint... anything. Be it a wall, a piece of furniture, or a canvas.

1. Invest in a drop cloth. Nothing beats having to take a spackling knife to your hardwood floor to get those paint drops off.

2. When painting with children, don't expect to get much done fast. And also don't let your eyes waver, even once. Don't blink. DON'T! My floor has a half of a smiley face.

3. Don't rush. You head straight into this project with the thought that it'll only take you a few hours if you don't stop. Midway though your sweating like Ron Jeremy in his newest porn film. (Don't ask me how I know this. Youtube is now forbidden in my house)

4. If it gets dark... wait. At about 8pm last night, there was paint in on every surface of my body that wasn't covered by clothing. Including my hair. My legs hurt like I had run a marathon and my arms felt like I was carrying my son all day. I just wanted to get it DONE. But waking up dismorning and seeing the mess that is my paint job, I need to go over it... again.

5. Sniff the paint fumes, you know you wanna. The worst and best advise I can give you. Giggle a little, laugh alot, this is suppost to be fun, right?

6. Always buy extra paint. To do those touchups, or a wall or two, after you've tried painting in the dark.

7. Buy 2 or three energy drinks. Or drink a whole pot of coffee.

8. Never underestimate what little could do. Don't put to much paint on the brush or the roller. It spatters, it makes a mess and it looks like crap afterwards.

9. Don't stop, EVER! Don't rush but don't stop. If you've started, don't sit down for 20 minutes and think you're going to get back up again. It doesn't happen.

10. It comes off with soap and water. I was covered head to toe in paint yesterday. Droplets that fell from the brush, I wiped off with my finger. It's nasty, it's dirty, but it gets the job done.

11. Wear Crappy clothes. Don't ever expect to wear these clothes again in public, unless your being a painter or Leonardo DiVinci for halloween.

12. Make sure the clothes cover certain parts of yourself. I made the mistake of wearing a tank top and shorts yesterday. It was great for me especially when I was bending down to get the last finish below the window, I would of been hindered of bending like that in jeans. But also apparently it was great for my neighbor's husband.

13. Pick colors you'll be able to stand in 3 years. Because believe me, you'll never want to go through this again.

And stupid me, I'm going to be doing my son's bedroom in a couple of weeks. I was going to do it next week but after yesterday, I need a vacation.

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